Soul Stealin' Demon
by Charlett
Summary: The Elite Beat Agents hardly ever get into scuffles.  It made it easier to get home in one piece.  However, when peoples' souls are being wrenched physically from their bodies, J is certain to stop the culprit at all costs.  Even if he loses his own...
1. Chapter 1

Alright! Here we go! I know I know, I write Ouendan a lot... but I LOVE EBA. Their little dances are so cute and sexy... I'm sorry, but I love EBA more than Ouendan now...

I actually finished the game before I finished this story... and this isn't all that GOOD... I was mostly testing out the characters' emotions, personalities, and whatnot. At the moment, I have backgrounds for them, but their personalities are very... loose and stuff. I hope to make more and show off more of their amazingness.

The story originally came from the song "The Devil Went Down to Georgia", by Charlie Daniels. Originally I had images of J outrocking the Devil himself to save his soul and win a microphone of gold or whatever. Hahaha. It eventually changed to something a little less... SUPER Devilish, and turned instead to a female Demon. We need more female OCs getting the crap beaten out of them anyway.

Hardest person to write for? SPIN. Gah Spin stop talking in your Ebonics. I can't do it well and still keep this in a K10 setting... If anyone has any pointers about that (or anything else, I might add...) please help me out. I want to improve in various dialects to bring you the best stories ever!

Anyway... READ ON!

---

Danger was hardly ever around the corner for BA-5, AKA Agent Spin. It was his job to jet pack or drive recklessly into a certain location, leap out of nowhere, and start singing directly into his microphone. It was nice to do what he loved: singing to inspire and help people in need. Because he was a singer rather than a fighter, he hardly ever got into any scuffles with anyone, and he couldn't be happier, as he was never much of a scrapper. 

In fact, during the moment, he (along with BA-3, AKA Agent Morris, who had happened to join him halfway on his journey to his mission), Agent Spin was doing just that, singing and dancing for a young high school student who was too scared to stand up to the local bully. What made Spin nervous about the mission, however, was not the bully but the target. The target, Kyle was actually a member of Spin's actual persona, Phillip Jackson's, class. After the mission ended (successfully, of course), the Kyle stepped forward to shake the hand of the teenager in shades, "Thanks so much for your help, Agents!" He said with a smile. Spin tried not to sweat too hard, "Hey… you remind me of someone…"

"Gotta go…!" Spin said suddenly, motioning for Morris to follow, "We're outta here, let's go, BA-3!"

"Keep up your work and stay in school!" Morris said, giving the student a "thumbs up" and following the heated Agent off, "What's up with you, Spin?"

"Nothing! Who said I wasn't feeling well?" Spin asked, grasping at his tie to give himself more air. He suddenly felt so hot! After that was finished, he pulled a small cube from his pocket. He pressed a tiny button it and it immediately expanded into a large jet pack, "Meet you at HQ. We got paperwork to fill out!"

Morris blinked at Spin as he soared off. The younger agent usually hated doing paperwork… The Agent shrugged lightly, and followed suit with a jet pack of his own. It was best to get all his work done ASAP, after all.

---

BA-2, AKA Agent J, seemed to be working incessantly on something in EBA Central's break room. The dancing prodigy slid to the side, twirled once, tapped his foot, and slid back to his original position, "two three four… five, six… seven…"

"Hey J, what's up?" Agent J stopped mid-electric-slide, and turned to glare daggers at the offender. Agent Spin felt the temperature in the room drop several degrees.

"You threw of my groove," J said, glaring at his subordinate. Spin, who had just finished his paperwork and was intent on stealing as many donuts from the break room as possible before heading off towards his home, wished he was anywhere but the room he was in right now.

"…I'm sorry…" Spin said, inching towards the coffee maker.

"You… threw off… my groove…" J twisted his neck and cracked it easily. Spin's stomach flipped, "I nearly got that dance move down… and you…"

"Threw off your groove…?" Spin guessed. The Agent gulped as J strode forward, placing his hands in his pockets, and glared angrily at the newest agent. J lifted his hand, and Spin prepared for the worst…

And J slapped his hand on Spin's shoulder, laughing uproariously, "Oh man, you should have seen your face!" He guffawed. He mimicked a woman's voice as he continued, "'Oh please, Agent J, don't slap me, I'm tender!'"

"I didn't say nothing like that!" Spin protested as J went to pour himself his own cup.

"Your eyes, boy, your eyes betrayed you," The experienced Agent replied, a knowing smile on his face. Spin stared at him, and he shrugged, 'Would you rather I say 'I can see into your miiiiiind?'"

"How come you always gotta act so strange, J?" Spin asked. The other man smiled.

"Comes with the territory, I guess," He replied, "Being an actor does that, you know…" He pushed off of the counter and moon-walked smoothly to the break table; not a drop of pure black coffee spilt to the floor. The prodigy twirled and said extraordinarily, "And when on Broadway, you have to be able to act, sing AND dance!"

"I don't think I'll ever get you, J…" Spin said as he slurped his own mug.

"No one gets us Agents. By all respects, we don't exist…" J replied, leaning against the table and slurping, "You can be whoever you want to be as an Agent, and as long as you get the job done without your identity being found out, you can do anything… You can be anyone you want! It's an actor's dream!"

"So… you work on Broadway?" J didn't make a sound as he sipped his drink, which was probably secret Agent J code for "Of course I am", and Spin continued, "I think my class is going to see one of your works in a month or two."

"Then you'll be seeing the greatest dancing of the contemporary world!" J proclaimed extravagantly. He finished the cup, stowed it away on the table, and resumed his practice, "one two three four… five six seven… What can I do, my dear… to catch, your ear…? I love you madly madly Madam Librarian… Marian…!" He slammed his foot down and flipped around, "Marian!"

Spin stared as J twisted, turned and slapped his heels against the floor, "Please tell me you ain't actually DOIN' 'Music Man'…?" BA-5 gawked.

J stopped again, twitching lightly, "I ain't doin' 'Music Man'," He said with a frown in a tone that said that he was indeed "doin'" Music Man, "But then again… you've also got no taste in finer music."

The two glared at each other, and J sighed, "I'll go practice somewhere else…" He grumbled, practicing how he was going to walk during the scene, muttering the tune to himself as he did so, "One two three… four five six…"

The teenager frowned at his cup of coffee. It suddenly tasted a whole lot more bitter. It wasn't that he hated the musical; it was just that J looked very weird dancing around with a love struck look in his eye. He was too good of an actor to not look the part, and J in love was way too weird for his taste. It was probably what made the coffee bitter.

Spin nearly dropped his mug when the entire world seemed to shudder. Spin looked up, and he realized he was being called. EBA Central seemed to be alive, and whenever Commander Khan needed him, he would know it. Placing the mug down and assuming someone else would take care of it for him (as most teenagers liked to think), he rushed off to get to the briefing room.

BA-4, AKA Agent Derek, was already there, his frown continuing to crease his face; it seemed to have frozen that way. Spin stopped in, gasping lightly from his rush to the briefing room, and he waved lightly at the man in the red afro, "H…Hey, Derek."

"Afternoon, Spin," He said flatly, turning to the screen that was blank at the moment, "Working hard?"

"Hardly working!" Spin replied with a smile. Derek glared at his subordinate, and Spin chuckled uneasily, "I mean… yeah, workin' hard…"

J rubbed his aching head as he entered the room, "Dangit…" He groaned, "How come the calls have to be so darn annoying…? My head is splitting in two…"

"Suck it up," Derek said, regarding the younger (but superior) Agent with slight hostility, "It's a wonder you were promoted so quickly with such a halfhearted approach to your work…"

"Ohhhh, I'm shaking!" J cried, shuddering comically like a bowl of jello, "BA-4's after my job! What ever will I do…?"

"You will conduct your business in an orderly and professional fashion, Agent J…" Everyone turned and Spin smiled lightly. At least he wasn't the one getting berated. BA-1, AKA Agent Chieftain, had entered the room. He glared at the two Agents who were bickering, and sidestepped for Morris to enter behind him, "It sickens me to see our forces fighting amongst each other."

"Hey, sorry Chieftain," J said, "I just… you know… Derek needs to lighten up a bit." Derek refused to say another word about the subject, as Chieftain's glaring was enough to shut anyone up.

"So…" Spin said, dragging his headphones down so he could scratch an itch on his ear, "We all here? What's the mission?"

As if on cue to answer the young agent's question, the large screen on the opposite side of the room exploded in color. A man's face adjusted his shades, and every one of the Elite Beat Agents snapped to attention. They stared into the face of the graying, former CIA agent, Commander Khan.

"Good afternoon, Agents," Khan said quickly. He then dispensed with the formality, "We have a serious problem on our hands."

"No kidding," J said, shrugging lightly, "One of the toilets in the men's room has clogged!" Many of the other Agents sighed.

"What's wrong with the world, Commander?" Spin asked, intent on getting to the bottom of this mission. He was eager to serve and ready for action as he reapplied his headphones, "Agent Spin is on the case!"

"Indeed," Commander Khan replied, twining his fingers together and placing them in front of his moustache'd face, "people are dying, Agents. It's happening all over the place."

"Dying…?" Morris asked, "As in… let's throw him in a hole and be done with it…?" It seemed strange to bring something like that up, "Unless it's happening at an increased rate…"

"There's not much we can do about dead people…" Derek elaborated, "Not unless our target is determined enough to come back. What's this mission really about, Commander?"

"It's about their souls, Gentlemen," Khan explained. Spin suddenly heard his commander's tone of voice. Was he… worried? "The victims have lost their souls."

An eerie silence fell across the Agents as they took in the information, "Could you clarify things further, Commander?" Chieftain asked.

"Everyone possesses a soul, you know," Khan said, "And when a body dies, it rejects its soul and the spirit is expelled to the great beyond." He waited a moment before asking, "You all know this, I presume?"

Most of the younger members shuffled their feet and muttered unintelligible things. Khan continued, "And yet… this is not what's been happening to the recent victims. Instead of their body expelling their soul naturally, the soul has been extracted forcefully by an unknown adversary."

"So you're sayin'…" Spin spoke up quickly, "You're sayin' that… folks are… getting wasted before they're supposed to…?"

"What happens to their bodies?" Derek asked, "Do they deteriorate like normal?"

"Few things are more unsettling than looking into the eyes of a soulless human," Khan murmured lightly, fingering his moustache as he continued, "It would be better to attempt to understand the feelings of a rabid mammal."

Spin's stomach was tying up in knots. Everything about this new mission (which hadn't even been actually spoken of) made him feel more and more insignificant. Hot blooded singing and dancing could only get them so far… Although… the Rhombulans were defeated by that… but they were only turning people to stone! They hadn't wrenched anything spiritual from them! It was like directly removing someone's hope and crushing it into powder…

"So is that it?" J asked. Everyone turned to him and he flipped his microphone expertly in his hand, "All we have to do is stop whatever's stealing peoples' souls and make him give them back, right?"

"Agent J…" Morris began, almost breathlessly.

"Come on, guys! So some moron's turning people into vegetables, then we'll find and stop him!" BA-2 turned away from the screen that had Khan's face on it, and attempted to inspire his "troops", "People are relying on US to get the job done! We've got to do something or else people will lose their loved ones for good!"

Spin shuffled his feet, and Chieftain adjusted his hat so it rested lower on his head. The Agents heard light clapping, and Khan smiled lightly, "Well said, Agent J," He said, "Let's hope you keep this optimism up for the duration of the mission."

"Don't you know it, Commander!" J said, giving the leader a "thumbs up", "We won't give up! People are depending on us!"

"I agree with J," Chieftain said, "There's nothing worse than an Agent who runs when the going gets tough. There are just a few questions I have for the Commander." Khan raised an eyebrow, and BA-1 looked up at the screen, "What of the Divas? Are they joining us? Also…" Chieftain seemed to be thinking very hard, and Spin wondered how the man seemed to know what to ask in every situation, "Is there any pattern to these victims? Do they share any connection?"

Derek glared at Khan (seeing as how the Agent glared at everyone) as the Commander nodded, "BD-3, BD-2, and BD-1 have already been dispatched. It was BD-2, Agent Foxx, who gave me the information about these attacks on people. About similarities…"

Khan adjusted a loose leaf paper on his desk, "Every one of the victims is both male and a risk taker."

"Excuse me…?" Morris blinked.

"A gambler, a man who will take the utmost amount of risks for fun," Khan explained, "It's almost as if this enemy feeds on people who enjoy a challenge…" The Agents didn't MEAN to all look at J immediately, but it happened nonetheless.

J smiled, "Oh, come on… You think I'm going down that easy? Chieftain's lived twice as long as me ("That's not true…" Chieftain grumbled)! I've got plenty of living to do!" He proclaimed.

"Yeah… but… J…" Spin muttered, adjusting his headphones, "Don't you think… you should sit this one out…?" BA-5 tried not to look at J's face, which showed everything but amusement, "I mean… really man… if you're the guy this guy's going to want to whale on…"

BA-2 frowned, and the only movement he gave was the shown through his microphone, which twisted and writhed in his hand. He snapped it up and turned to his superior, "Commander, requesting permission to head out on this mission immediately…!" Spin sighed. He only wanted to help…

"Right then, you understand the mission, everyone?" Khan asked. No one spoke up, and the commander nodded, pulling back, "Agents… are…"

J was already bolting for the door before the commander could finish his line, "GO!!!" and the others followed directly after, although Chieftain led the charge after J.

"I won't give up!" J said to himself, "and you guys better not either!"

Morris smiled lightly, "Give him time, he'll lighten up."

"I'm not sure if I prefer him lighter…" Derek said frankly. Spin tried not to smile. He was just glad everyone was still acting like themselves. Not even an evil entity sworn to steal the souls of innocent gamblers could get them to act worriedly. He just didn't notice the fact that Chieftain was glaring intently at BA-2. Spin was right; no matter how invincible the protégé thought of himself… he was still in danger.

"Agents…" BA-1 said gruffly, making everyone look up at the man as they rushed towards the EBA's blimp, "I want everyone to keep an eye on J. He's not thinking clearly."

"Right, Chief!" Spin said, and then blinked, "err… tain… Chieftain…" he corrected himself… badly.

The Agents didn't say another word. Their first order of business was to find the Divas. They would know where to go from there…

---

BD-3, AKA Agent Missy, breathed loudly onto her glasses and rubbed them down with a handkerchief. After reapplying them, she placed the kerchief in her butt pocket and turned to BD-1, AKA Agent Starr, "Hey Starr, you found anything out…?"

Starr looked up at Missy, shaking her head lightly, "Sorry, Missy…" She said sorrowfully, turning back to the man on the bed. There was color in his face, and for all respects, he looked perfectly normal. It was just that his eyes were hollow; his blue eyes had lost all their sparkle, and he seemed to be nothing more than an incredibly lifelike mannequin as he lay on the bed, "But I haven't been able to find out any cures to this… We're going to have to find the very person who attacked them…"

"That's going to be a problem…" BD-2, AKA Agent Foxx, said mechanically, tapping away on her laptop a little ways away from the other two, "After all, this person… if it can be called a person… has attacked only males… I would seriously doubt it will show its face around us. It's been doing a good job at avoiding detection for this long, and I doubt that's going to change for a while."

"So we're stuck…" BD-2 sighed, dropping into a chair in the small cottage the women were hiding out in, "Waiting for the men…?"

"I just hope they can do something about this…" Starr murmured, placing her hand on the soulless man's forehead. It was surprisingly warm, "Having them dispatched means nothing if this foe does not appear before them…"

Missy smiled, "I'm sure it'll be fine!" She said jovially, "You know the Agents are the best at what they do! We just have to wait until they come, right?"

"Speaking of the devil…" Foxx said blandly as she tapped away at the laptop. The two Divas looked up as the door burst open and BA-2 slid into the room, microphone in hand and pompadour bouncing as light as a feather.

"BA-2, Agent J, at your service!" He said, energetic as usual. Foxx paid him no mind, but Missy got stars in her eyes.

"Agent J, you've come!" She said, standing up and twirling about in happiness, "We were just talking about you! How spooky!"

"Hello Divas," Morris said as he entered. Spin was last to enter the small cottage. He was still shy around the women, seeing as how they were in such a higher league than he.

Starr stood and regarded the men favorably, "Well, that was quick," BD-1 said gratefully, "We have need of your expertise in this field."

"Expertise…?" Chieftain said, intrigued, "Explain."

"Gladly," Starr replied, but then turned to her subordinate, "Foxx?"

BD-2 sighed lightly and spun in her chair, addressing the Agents, "Right, here goes. It's complicated, so get a paper and pencil out if you have trouble following things."

She actually waited for a moment, but since no one had anything on them like what she suggested, she had to sigh and continue, "This new adversary is stealing souls. We all know that, right?" She motioned little ways away from her, and the Agents were able to get their first glance of what everyone was talking about. It made Spin's blood run cold to see the middle aged man, lying unmoving on the bed. Everyone turned back to Foxx not only to listen to her continue but to keep from looking at the man, "Whatever thing has attacked these people, it's fast, lithe, skillful, and good at keeping itself unheard of. It's causing quite a stir amongst the people. We need to nip this thing in the bud, and fast."

"How do you propose we do that, Foxx?" Derek asked, getting right to the point.

"There must be a reason this creature is targeting risk takers…" Foxx murmured in thought, "I would suppose because it is a gambler as well."

There was silence for a moment, and Spin spoke up, "Well… you're sayin'… that it's bettin' with the victims…?" BA-5 asked. He then remembered his manners, "Uh… ma'am…?"

"I would assume so," Foxx replied, "It's betting with the victims and beating them in some sort of game. Afterwards, it steals the soul as payment."

"So it's a Game of Death then!" J said. Everyone groaned from his cheesy line, "And so if this thing has approached people without much problem, we can all assume it's human." He thought for a moment, "Well, I guess human…like…"

"Humanoid…?" Morris threw out the word for J, who obviously didn't know what he was talking about, "A humanoid monster getting people to bet their very lives… this creature's got to be giving out something incredibly awesome to be worth someone betting their very soul over."

"It sounds like one of those sick stories they'd tell you when you were little to scare you into behaving…" Missy said, rocking in her chair, "You know, the 'if you don't behave, the devil will come and steal your soul away…!' line."

"So the course of action is this," Chieftain rumbled, "If the only way to get this creature to come out is to…"

"We'll need bait, won't we?" J suddenly spoke up. Everyone turned to him, and Spin cast him a pleading look, as if to beg him not to continue what he was going to say. BA-2 said it, "We need someone who can try and lure this person out. I nominate…"

"No." A flat reply was given. J stopped as Chieftain continued, "You're not going."

"Really? I was going to say Morris should go," J said without skipping a beat. BA-3 began to turn as pale as a colored person could get.

"Enough jokes, J," Derek grumbled, "We need to think of a better plan than just throwing someone to the wolves…"

"BA-1, may I speak with you?" Starr asked. She stood up from her place by the bed and placed her hands on her hips, "A conference of the leaders will clear this up, don't you agree?"

Chieftain nodded lightly, "I understand," He agreed. He then turned to the Agents and Divas, "We'll confer outside. Well?"

Starr smiled and approached the Agent. She placed her hand on his shoulder and led him off outside, "Let's speak about this together, shall we?"

Spin groaned, "Cummon, you're not gonna stick us with the stiff, are ya?"

Derek glared at BA-5 as the lead Agent and Diva left to work out a plan, "Stiffs are the least of our worries, Spin. Remember that."

"Of course they are!" Spin suddenly said, beginning to crack after a while, "We're built for dancin', not fightin'! What are we supposedta do, DANCE the souls back? Only reason it worked last time was because the people wanted us to save 'em! Since when did we hear a cry for help from one of the jerks? I bet they WANTED to lose what they did!"

"BA-5, you will stand down," Morris said sternly, "This is out of your hands."

Spin looked away with a mutter and crossed arms, "It ain't fair… it really ain't…"

"Well, while we wait, we can play Parcheesi," Missy suggested. The Agents blinked at her, "Or maybe charades…?"

"I think we really should focus on calming our nerves," Morris replied, "All worry and no relaxation makes for…"

"Derek?" J interrupted with an abstract question. Spin sighed and went to inspect some items in the cottage. It was better than listening to the Agents attempt (and fail) to lighten the mood. Perhaps BA-5 was tired. His mind was swimming, as if it was clouded. All of the worrying about the mission was taking a toll on him already. No wonder he was still a rookie…

However, the fog in Spin's mind was anything but dull, tired senses. They were sixth senses waiting to be refined. J suddenly looked up, alert, "Do you hear that…?" BA-2 whirled around, and Spin looked up, "Can you hear it?"

"Hear…?" Derek looked up, and peered at the ceiling as if looking upwards at the sky, "Yes, I hear it…"

"I got it!" Morris approved, "Someone's calling!"

Spin spun and looked at the others, amazed at their ability to sense a person in need of help, "Ya sure?"

"It's soft…" Foxx murmured, looking up from her laptop (gasp!) to concentrate on the faint cry for assistance, "I can barely feel it… Missy, can you?"

"Not really… You're always better at it than I, Foxx…" She said halfheartedly, embarrassed at her lack of skill.

"Alright, I'm off," J said quickly, rushing to the door, "Who's with me?"

"I'm coming," Morris raised his hand, and he turned to BA-5, "Spin, you need the practice. Let's go."

"Me…?" Spin gulped. He then nodded and rushed after the two, "I… I'm comin'!"

"Great. You three hold down the fort while we're gone, alright?" J said of the last three in the cottage.

"I refuse," Derek replied, his face was as cross as his arms were, "Chieftain gave you specific orders to stay here, J. Let someone else handle this mission."

J stiffened, "…I…I can do this!" he said forcefully, although it sounded a little immature to the ears of BA-3 and 4.

"We don't doubt your ability J…" Morris muttered, "But Derek's got a point… You really should be more careful right now. Who knows what kind of…"

"Whether or not you're coming, I'm going," J said, determination evident in his voice, "An Agent never backs down! Chieftain said it himself!"

"But J…!" Spin stuttered, "You know… sometimes it's best to know when… to hold them… and when to fold them… right?"

"Hold? Fold…!?" J continued to rant as he grabbed at his head, "Aarrg…! It's hurting…!" The plea for help was getting stronger, and BA-2 felt strong empathy for the one in need. He looked up, attempting to keep calm despite the raging emotions within him, "Look, people…" He winced from the pain, "Someone's got to go and help this guy, rather than sitting around and debating who should do it. This is our job, people! Don't ever forget it!"

J defeated the nay-sayers with his speech, and everyone fell quiet. BA-2 turned around, "I'm going. Spin, Morris?"

"Of course we're going," Morris answered the unspoken question, "Derek?"

"I'll wait here…" BA-4 grumbled. J made a motion to leave, but Derek suddenly spoke up from where he stood, "J… whatever you do… take care of yourself, alright?"

BA-2 stared in mute disbelief, and then nodded with a smile, "Yeah, I will. I promise." Derek didn't say another word and let the three Agents rush off to aid the one in trouble.

Foxx waited for a while before returning to her laptop, and Missy thought of what to do, "So… I suppose there won't be any Parcheesi…?"

Derek frowned at BD-3, and she smiled lightly, "Well… I have a Sudoku puzzle book… you like numbers, don't you, BA-4…?"

He stiffened, and finally relinquished, "Fine… but it's only for you."

"Hurray! You're a great guy, Derek!" He didn't reply to that, but sat down next to the Diva as she dug around in her pack, looking for her book. It seemed like it would be a waiting game for the three secret agents...

...It was just that it was so hard to wait knowing that members of their team were in danger...

To Be Continued...

Or something like that.

Hope you guys liked it. I want some feedback, so please give it over! Thanks!


	2. Chapter 2

Alright. Chapter two. Status on my novel is 12k words out of 50k. I should be able to finish it by the end of the month, but let's keep hoping, alright?

This story is finished, so all you have to do is wait until I upload it all. Hope you enjoy chapter 2!

READ ON!

---

"No…! No, it's not fair! You CHEATED!" A man shouted out loud in the outskirts of a bustling city. He took a step back, "You can't say that you won! It's not fair…!"

"Didn't I say…?" The woman before him took a step forward, a malicious smile spread across her face, "You're just a poor loser… the rules were explicit…"

"But…! But you SAID…!" The man whirled around and dashed off. The woman licked her lips and ran in pursuit of her prey, "Someone! Someone, help me! HEEEAALP…!!" The woman let out a tremendous howl and leapt into the air, her long, sharp nails flashing in the light…

…and she was promptly hit full force by a sleek convertible that had just caught some air. The female creature fell backwards from the strike, and she rolled several yards away, lying prone on the floor.

"What did I tell you about watching where you're going, J?" Morris berated the younger man. BA-3 stood up from the backseat where he was located, "For all we know, you just HIT our mission!"

"Hey, it's not MY fault she just leapt up out of nowhere!" J retorted, glaring at his subordinate, "It's like hitting a cat that ran in the street!"

"Cats n' people are two different things, J!" Spin said, clearly aghast that BA-2 didn't seem to realize the difference between apples and oranges.

"I don't see YOU driving, Spin!" BA-2 flailed, standing up so he could look down on BA-5, "You don't even have a license!"

"Sure I do!" Spin asserted, "I mayah got it last month, but at least I look where I'm GOING!" The Agents continued to argue amongst themselves, but were interrupted when a man rushed up to them, his eyes wide and wild.

"You… you guys…! You came…!" The man smiled brightly, "You saved me, thank you!"

J blinked at the man, and turned to Morris, who turned to Spin, who continued to frown at J. BA-2 straightened up and pointed at the target happily, "So, you're safe now!" He said with a rising intonation, as if he was really asking the man, "So then…"

"…Mission Complete!"

"What mission?" Morris asked, scratching under his hat, "You don't even know what the mission was."

"Like it matters, as long as it's complete…" The highest ranking agent muttered.

"Hey… g…guys…?" Everyone turned to Spin, who pointed a little ways away, "I…d…don't guess this mission's ova yet…"

J whirled around (and nearly fell over, as he was still standing in the convertible), and Morris's upper lip lifted in sheer disgust as the woman who had been struck by the car began to push herself from the floor. She dizzily stood on her two legs, and snapped her head back in place (as it was facing completely backwards). Finally finished with her work, she turned slowly to the agents and their target, "…That…wasn't very nice…"

"Holy crap! It's a Zombie!" Spin shouted, "Where's a AK-47 when you need one!?"

"A what?" Morris blinked.

"AK-47s're natural Zombie repellants. Didn't you know?" BA-5 answered.

"No wait, it wasn't AK-47s, it was horrible tasting nuts," J reminded Spin, "Don't you remember?"

"No no no, it's DEFINITELY AK-47s."

"I always thought a good mop to the brain was the best way to deal with a Zombie infestation," Morris said. The younger Agents stared in disbelief at BA-3. Talk about archaic Zombie repellant procedures!

"Oh please…" The woman said, taking a step forward. The target gave a cry and retreated a few steps, "I don't have a bone to pick with any of you nice, suit clad men… My business is with the man behind you." She strode forward as if she had never been struck by the car, "Now if you'll excuse me…"

She was interrupted when Morris leapt from the car by jumping over the door and landing right in front of her, "I'm sorry to say that our business is with this same man," He said, snapping his fingers once, twice, thrice. His microphone swayed in his free hand as he pointed at the woman, "So if you'll excuse…" BA-3 stopped when he got a good look at the creature's face, "…us…?"

"Morris, what's the matter?" J asked, clearly worried for his friend's sake. Morris looked up from his stupor to look at BA-2, and the female leapt over him so she could land gracefully next to her prey.

"No!" The target cried as the woman stalked up to him, smile glistening brightly, "Not again! Please!"

"Stop right there!" The woman flinched and backed away from the hot blooded voice that commanded authority. BA-5 was a rookie, but that didn't mean his skills were lacking any, "Don'tcha dare take another step!"

"I should have known…" The woman hissed, "The Elite Beat Agents are at his service, are they?"

"You were expecting anything less?" Spin said with a smile, "Now get lost, or we'll be forced to… to… do something very horrible! Like sing! Off key! Right in your ears! It's annoyin', and I would know. My sister's tone deaf…"

"Morris, hey Morris, you alright?" J asked, shaking BA-3 on the shoulder, "You seem out of it."

"It can't be…" Morris muttered. He looked up at his superior and elaborated, "She looked… just like my wife…"

J blinked at BA-3, turned to the woman, cocked his head, and turned back to Morris, "Are you sure…? Your wife is assaulting innocent men and…"

"I never said she WAS my wife… the resemblance was just uncanny…"

"Hey man, if that's what your wife looks like…" J pat his fellow Agent on the back, "You're the luckiest guy this side of Santa Barbra! Now, if you can't follow up with this mission because of her, I want you to get the target out of her sight, alright? Spin and I will hold her off."

"Understood," Morris said, "I'll protect him with my life."

"Oh yeah, and while you're gone…" J gave the man a wink, "Send for backup, please?"

"You got it, J."

"Uhhh… BA-2?" J looked up as Morris went to assist the (still) nameless target, "She's not listenin' to me anymore!"

"Out of my way, you puny agents!" The woman hissed, barreling past the young Agent who was standing on the hood of the convertible, "And make way for my meal!" She lunged forward and caught the man's shoulders. With a scream, the man was sent tumbling to the floor with the woman pinning him from the top, "Bwohohoho! Humans are so easy to overpower!"

"Don't give up!" The Agents shouted in unison. The tapping of feet was heard, and the Agents, from their locations on the ground and hood, began to dance and sing, "Get up off the ground! We're not giving up without a fight!"

The target struggled as the woman fought with her victim, but he listened to the Agents. He didn't give up. With a grunt, he pulled his legs up and slammed into her stomach. She fell backwards, winded, and the man scrambled up, turning to escape.

"Morris! Don't you get him into trouble!" J shouted as he and Spin went to assure the woman didn't continue her pursuit. She seemed to be recovering from the hits by both the car and her former victim.

"Ohhh, you guys really are nasty little jerks…" She hissed as she crawled back up. Just like last time, it took her a moment to regain her bearings, but she soon recovered and hissed at the fact that BA-3 and her prey had disappeared, "How dare you get in the way of Sigrid the Beautiful?"

"Well, at least she lives up to her title…" J muttered under his breath. Spin sighed lightly, "Look, lady, it's practically obvious that you're the one we're after, so just fess up. You're stealing people's souls, aren't you?"

Spin shifted uneasily as Sigrid laughed aloud. It was the sound of a beautiful voice, but mixed in it was a poisonous aspect. If no one had seen her superhuman feats of recovery, they would have known she was no normal woman simply from her laugh, "I would suppose that it was incredibly easy to figure that one out, Agent J." She placed her hand on her hip and extended her free hand, "Tell me, what do you expect to do now that you know?"

"What else?" J said, shrugging lightly, "I intend to take them back. You can't gamble your way out of this one, Ma'am!"

"Why do you look like her?" Spin suddenly asked. Both Sigrid and J turned to look at BA-5, "It's too weird that you look like her!"

"Like who?" J turned to stare at Sigrid, who seemed to be way too smug for his tastes, and he looked back at his subordinate, "Like Morris' wife?"

Spin stared back at J, "No she doesn't," He said, "She looks just like Asha…!"

"Who?" Sigrid began to sidle off after BA-3 as the two other Agents spoke to each other.

"Well… you know…" BA-5 shrunk down from embarrassment, and J shrugged, "Asha… she's the girl… I like… from class… you know…? She's real popular… and…"

"She's… what…?" J and Spin turned to Sigrid, who stopped when she was caught trying to escape. BA-2 turned back to Spin, "So you're saying your female heartthrob is a pale as hell, dark haired beauty who wears tight leather and owns a whip?"

"What…? NO!" Spin said, "Asha is an African name! She's dark as chocolate!"

The two turned back to Sigrid, who rubbed her cheek in "embarrassment", "You know, it's always so infuriating to have to explain these things to you mortals. As a Succubus from the bowels of Hell itself, I tend to have the rather annoying ability to look like the sexiest woman you humans think of."

"Ohhhhh…" The Agents said in unison. It all made sense now! Except then Spin blinked, "Wait, so the sexiest woman you think of wears tight leather and uses whips? J, you're sayin' you're like THAT?"

"Did I say that…?" J drawled innocently, looking like he was deep in thought, "I must have been mistaken, because I totally am not like that at all…" BA-5 wondered how J ever got promoted to BA-2… he just didn't seem leader material at all!

"Well then, now that my deepest secrets have been revealed, perhaps now we can get down to business…" Sigrid said, obviously giving up on her prey for now, "You wish to foil the plans of Hell and have me release the souls I have obtained fairly, is that correct?"

"Sounds about right!" J replied, wagging a finger at Sigrid, "You didn't use cliff notes, did you?"

"I see," The succubus said slowly. She placed her hand behind her back and surprisingly came up with an intricately made jar, filled to the brim with a bright blue substance that Spin likened to watery jello… or something to that effect… "So, you want me to open this jar and release the 238 souls I have collected over the past month."

"Do you want me to say 'yes' again?" J asked, "Because I will, you know. You don't know how many times I'll say it before boredom sets in. That's because I never told you, but I can assure it's a lot of times."

Sigrid smirked nastily, "And I can assure you that unless I pull off this cork on my own free will, these souls will never return to their natural life."

There was silence as J thought very hard about this, and he spoke up, "So could you open the jar of your own free will, pretty please?" Sigrid hissed as she glared at the joker.

"I cannot give up what I toiled for my job for just anything. You'd have to give me something in return…" Sigrid pulled the jar back and hid it again, "What do you have that is worth 238 souls, Agent BA-2?"

J seemed to be thinking (really) for once. He looked up at her, a serious look on his face, "What do you suggest, Sigrid?" He asked. His cocky smile returned and he puffed himself up, "I have no idea how much a soul is worth, but you seem to have some idea. What do I have that's worth what you're asking?" Spin wished he could shut J up, but he wasn't afraid for the Agent, really. After all, J's soul couldn't possibly be worth 200, so it seemed he was in the clear.

…Yet there was a nagging feeling in the back of his mind that this wasn't a smart idea…

Sigrid seemed to be deep in though, and suddenly she smiled, laughing out loud, "Oh, Dear Agent, you fool yourself! To think that you actually believe you and anything you own are worth what you ask for." She suddenly became deathly serious, and peered at the man through her nasty, bright eyes, "A thought does come to mind, however…" She murmured lowly.

"J, don't listen!" Spin said, "Whatever she's thinkin' is gunna to leave you down and out, I know it! Let's wait for Morris' backup! J, listen to me!"

"What's your brilliant idea, then?" J asked. Spin was about to explain his brilliant plan, until he realized BA-2 was actually speaking to Sigrid, "I'm pretty sure I can't simply sing at you until you open that thing, so I'll give you a penny for your thoughts."

"I was thinking, just in passing, mind you…" The succubus murmured in a voice that clearly meant she wasn't thinking anything in passing, "That perhaps you'd like to make a wager…?"

A wager!? Spin leapt up and grabbed J's sleeve, hissing lowly in his ear, "J, don't you dare! You know what's her plan!"

"So you're planning on wagering all of your souls…?"

"If you win, the souls go free, if I win, you become number 239…"

"J!!"

BA-2 let out a chuckle, completely ignoring his subordinate, "So what's the game, huh? I'm personally no good at cards. I have the worst poker face you can imagine."

"You EBA dance, do you not?" Sigrid asked rhetorically, "Then I'll tell you what. If you can follow my dance moves perfectly, the hardest I can think of, then I'll let everyone caught before you free."

"And if I can't, then that means you…"

"AGENT BA-2!" J finally turned and blinked at Spin, who was wearing a glare so furious BA-2 was actually taken aback, "Listen to me for once! Everyone told you to be careful, and she's leadin' you right into her trap! Don't take her up on this offer, J! You'll only regret it!"

"You don't trust me?" BA-5 stopped his rant to listen to J's strangely soft spoken question, "You don't have faith in my abilities?"

Spin looked down, scratching his head, "You know I don't mean it like that, but think about it, she hasn't lost any of these wagers before, I bet…."

"…That's right…!" Sigrid interrupted; BA-5 continued without a hitch.

"…and there must be a reason she's had a record of 238 wins and no losses. J, I'm beggin' you, think for a sec, please."

"All I can think of is two hundred people that need help. I can't hear them… but I can feel their desperation…" BA-2 glared at Sigrid, "and if I turn tail here… we'll lose her and she'll only collect more souls… and the Jedis are going to REALLY feel that."

Spin blinked, "Jedis…?" He groaned, "I shoulda known you'd make another cheesy line, J…"

"You two are taking so long, I'd die of old age if I weren't immortal," Sigrid said testily, "Yes or no, Agent J?" She extended her hand, "You Humans shake hands to solidify deals, right? So shake on it." She demanded.

Spin winced as J walked forward, spitting on his hand and grasping her hand, making her wince from the touch of human saliva, "You got yourself a deal, Succubus."

"Right…" She said, rubbing her saliva filled hand on her clothes, "Well then… I suppose I'll start. You follow. Are you ready?

"Three, Two, One, GO!"

Spin wasn't all that amazed. Her first move was a Hula Dance. BA-5 knew that every move symbolized an idea, but he wasn't sure just what she was trying to convey in the moves. J seemed to know, however. His mouth was moving lightly as he translated the entire dance. Most likely he would use the translation to copy the dance. Spin had to admit, when it came down to it, BA-2 was really good at his job.

The first test was finished, and J passed with flying colors. He landed his foot down and lifted his arms, just like she did when she finished, "Next!" He said; he hadn't even broken a sweat. However, Sigrid hadn't either. She wasn't worried, there were still four dances left.

"Right! On to the next one!"

It was a Jig. Spin found the Succubus was tapping quickly, so quickly it was hard to see her feet move. However, J was better. He was so good, he copied her before she finished her dance, and finished it in a flash, "That all you got?"

"You…!" Sigrid hissed at his cocky smile, "Let's see you handle this!!"

Spin closed his eyes, racking his brain on the name of the next dance. He could have sworn he had heard it called "Gypsy Brass", but he knew it had an official name that he probably couldn't pronounce. J passed that test as well, although he looked a little worse for wear. His pompadour wasn't drooping, so Spin wasn't worried, but…

Spin didn't even know what the next dance was, it was so obscure. He assumed it was a native African dance, but he wondered if J knew the specifics behind it, because he seemed to be thinking. BA-2 didn't move a muscle as she continued, and BA-5 bit his bottom lip in worry.

Spin was worried for naught, as the moment she stopped, J started, and he didn't stop until he finished it perfectly. J's breathing was slightly labored when he finished, but he didn't look nearly as bad as Sigrid, who was sweating bullets and thinking hard for what to do next.

Finally, she composed herself (as she was a master of doing), she suddenly reached out and smiled, "May I have this last dance?" She asked sweetly. J was taken aback, and suddenly realized. The last dance was a partner dance. She wanted to see if he could do it.

"I suppose…" He drawled. Spin didn't really like the idea of watching BA-2 dancing with the enemy, especially the enemy that looked suspiciously and scarily like the very woman he had a crush on since Middle School. It was a slow waltz, and although J was the male, he had no problem following so the woman could lead, as was the rules.

Finally, the music in J's mind began to slow. Sigrid was twirled one more time, and the two released each others' hands, both panting lightly from the five consecutive dances finished. The Succubus then smiled, "You're a mighty fine dancer, Agent J…"

"Yeah well, I don't want to brag, but I'm the best there is, you know?"

"Except…" A sinister smile spread across Sigrid's lips, "You didn't complete the required fields..." J froze and Spin's jaw dropped, "And that means your soul is forfeit to me..."

To Be Continued...

---

Yeah, way to end at a cliffhanger, Christy.

Review or summin.

Also WORST... CLIFFHANGER...EVAR...


	3. Chapter 3

Something about this story doesn't seem right. I don't know, it just seems mediocre and dumb. Sorry for the stupidness, everyone...

If you still want to read it, then READ ON!

---

The Succubus smiled nastily, "You're a mighty fine dancer, Agent J…"

"Yeah well, I don't want to brag, but I'm the best there is, you know?"

"Except…" A sinister smile spread across Sigrid's lips, "You didn't complete the required fields." J froze and Spin's jaw dropped, "And that means your soul is forfeit to me..."

Spin stood up angrily as J eyed her suspiciously, "What are you talking about?" BA-5 shouted, "J danced fine each time! He passed your stupid test!"

"You're right, he did dance perfectly on all five dances…" The Succubus laughed aloud as she continued, "But he didn't follow my last dance perfectly! He followed, not led, and that…" Sigrid smiled, "Means a victory for me…"

"That's not…" J sputtered, "You cheated! I'll dance right now, and show you I can…!"

"Did I cheat…? You already danced and ruined your chance, BA-2," Sigrid's pearly, sharp teeth were seen as she smiled brightly, "The rules were explicit… I win, Agent J… You belong to me now…"

J wasn't sure exactly what to do. Spin whipped up his microphone as Sigrid leapt forward, her prey changing quickly from the man Morris had saved to BA-2, "Leave J alone!" Spin shouted. BA-2 grunted as Sigrid landed on top of him, knocking the wind from his ribcage. BA-5 tried another tactic: he cheered his superior on, "J, you can escape! J, get up! You can…!"

J struggled mightily, fighting against the Succubus, who had placed her hands on his shoulders to keep him from getting up. He reached up with his fist and, with an apology, slammed it into her face. Her head whipped back, but she seemed overall unfazed. She opened her mouth wide and reached down, but instead of sucking out BA-2's soul, she got a mouth full of his microphone, which he had stuffed in her mouth as a last ditch effort.

"You know, I should have known…" J said with a smile as the two continued to struggle against each other, "…that you look so natural with something that big in your mouth. Did you finally bite off more than you can chew?"

Sigrid turned red with anger as she fought with the microphone, and opened her mouth wide. Biting down furiously, she bit the instrument in half, and J blinked at the half that he held in his hand, "I have a feeling you're angry, would that be…?" He was interrupted as she spat what was left of the microphone at her captive. He lifted his free hand to claw the shards from his vulnerable eyes, and Sigrid used that opportunity to grasp J's cheeks harshly, and she pressed her lips against his.

Sigrid only stopped the kiss when she felt something slam against her head, "Get off of him!" Spin shouted, "Leave him alone! Leave J alone!" The Succubus, more surprised than anything, immediately drew away and tended to the bruise that was accumulating on her forehead. Agent BA-5 checked on his superior.

"J? J, are you alright?" Spin asked. He wiped the shards from J's face and pried the man's eye open. He recoiled at the inhuman sight of truly soulless eyes, and Spin turned to Sigrid, malice evident in his look and voice, "What did you do to him?"

"My Kiss of Death worked like a charm…" The Succubus said. She lifted up a tiny vial, filled completely with the same beautifully shining blue substance, "Say hello to your Agent J!" She tapped the vial lightly with her fingernail, "He's a bright little guy, isn't he?" she said of the soul's bright luminescence, "Too bad it didn't help him much, huh?"

"Give him back!" Spin lunged at the demon recklessly, all abandon immediately lost. His only mission was to get that vial back! "Give him BACK!"

Sigrid sidestepped quickly, making sure to trip up the Agent to add insult to injury, "Aw, what a sweety… you love your little leader, don't you?"

"You cheated!" BA-5 stressed angrily, crawling about on the floor in an attempt to reapply his headphones. He looked up at her from where he sat on the floor and clenched his fists in rage, "That wasn't a fair challenge and you KNOW it!"

"You did too, didn't you…?" The Succubus asked with a smile as she fingered J's soul. Spin growled at her, "You knew that it wouldn't turn out alright… and yet you let him continue… Why didn't you stop him, Agent Spin…? If I didn't know any better…

"I'd say it was your fault this happened to him…"

Spin stopped in his tracks as her deadly serious voice cut him like a knife. His mouth opened and closed as if he was a fish out of water, and he finally spoke up, "What's your problem?" He shouted miserably, "You…! You're such a…!"

"What are you going to do, Agent Spin…?" Sigrid said; her smile had disappeared and she was looking down on him with a serious frown, "Are you going to fight for your superior? Will you play with me to save him…?" Spin blinked at her, and she continued in her grim tone, "I really doubt a teenager owns anything worth a genius' soul… so will you bet your soul to save his…?"

Spin clenched his teeth so hard he gave himself a headache. What could he say? What could he do? He didn't…! He couldn't…! He finally dropped to the floor, an Agent defeated, "I… I can't do it…" He moaned, "If J couldn't… how can I?"

"What a pathetic sight…" Sigrid said lowly, rubbing the warm essence against her cheek as she continued, "To watch such a wretched creature, crawling on the ground. He won't even work to save those he cares for…" She turned around and began to leave, "I can't even stand to look at him… I'm out of here…"

"Hold it right there…" Sigrid stopped cold when another voice appeared from behind her. Spin looked up, hoping to remove the sight that he had been crying and dirtying his suit. There, with BA-3 and BA-4, Morris and Derek, flanking him, was BA-1, Agent Chieftain, "Don't you move…"

"And I so hoped to get out of here before you arrived…!" Sigrid hissed, whirling around to glare at the men before her.

"Chieftain…!" Spin stood up as the Agents strode forward. The demon looked around for some way to escape, but realized it wouldn't be possible with Derek and Morris on the job, "She… she… J is…!"

"Tell me everything that happened, Spin," Chieftain said, "but be calm about it." Spin took a deep breath, and relayed everything to him.

Spin looked at the floor after he relayed his message, "I'm sorry, Chieftain… I couldn't get J to stop…" BA-5 looked ashamed, "if I hadn't worked harder to stop him… he might've…"

Chieftain silenced his subordinate, "Take care of J for me," he said lowly, "I'll handle everything…"

"Ohhh…! This will be rich!" Sigrid said with a laugh, "What are you planning on doing, BA-1…?"

"Picking up where J left off…" Chieftain said without a hitch, "Are you up for another game, Succubus?"

"I see…" Sigrid murmured lightly, "I never pegged you to be a gambling man, BA-1…"

"I'm not," Chieftain replied, taking a step forward, "But you do strange things for your friends. I doubt you'd ever understand, however…"

Spin wanted to follow orders and tend to J's soulless body, but he was scared for his superior. They hadn't seen her assault BA-2, they hadn't seen his soul be physically wrenched from his body… He didn't know if he could bear to see it happen again to anyone, "…Chieftain…"

"Quiet," BA-1 said gruffly, "You have no say in this, BA-5."

"But…!"

"This is out of your league," Derek said with his trademark glare, "Stand down."

Morris continued to try to console the younger Agent, "Trust us, Spin. I know it's hard… but I can assure you, Chieftain knows what he's doing…"

Spin couldn't bear to hear that word again… "Trust"… J used that same excuse beforehand, and everything turned out terribly. BA-5 wasn't sure if he should accept what the others assured him. Everything seemed so strange. Spin couldn't believe that this demon couldn't just leave. Something was making her stay… "Don't get killed, Chieftain…"

"I won't," BA-1 replied, determination in his voice. Spin had to accept that he was telling the truth… "Succubus," The man said, adjusting his hat, "We'll use the same rules as before."

"Dance contest, five to go, copy me and I release the souls. Fail…"

"The rules will change here…" Sigrid blinked at BA-1, and Chieftain pointed at the vial she still clutched in a fist, "You will release him."

"Agent J…?" The Succubus looked at the vial, and turned to Chieftain, "So you will trade places, then…?"

"J was right. He's got much more living to do than I." Chieftain replied. He extended his hands as he reminisced through his past, "My only regret would be that if I lose, I will not be able to say goodbye to my family one last time…"

Sigrid smiled widely, "What a delicious turn of events…" She said with a smile, "an entire family displaced without their father… how delightfully chaotic…" She licked her lips seductively, and held the vial out, "You've got yourself a deal, BA-1! One prodigy for the experienced master! Be aware that the only reason I'm doing this is because I've never lost a match…

"…and I don't plan on that changing any time soon…"

"Then get started," Chieftain growled, his arms crossed and his stance at the ready, "show me your hardest dances…"

"With pleasure…"

Spin didn't watch the contest. He didn't really want to think about it, so instead he focused solely on his charge. What was strange about losing your soul was that the body seemed to continue to work just fine without it. J looked like he was sleeping, so as long as Spin didn't look at his eyes (which wasn't a problem, as they were closed), he could pretend that there was nothing wrong with BA-2, and he was just taking a rest.

It was the only thing that kept him from sobbing in guilt, "Hey J…" He muttered, "When you wake up… will you forgive me for screwin' up?" He suddenly chuckled, "What am I talkin' about? You should be askin' for forgiveness from me! You were the one who screwed up and made everyone worry…!

"…I ain't never gunna understand you, J…" He muttered as he talked to the soulless Agent. So what if he looked insane? It made him feel better to think of him as alright. Chieftain would bring him back, anyway, so it was going to be okay… He knew it…

"…May I have this last dance…?" BA-5 looked up as Sigrid held out her hand, smiling sweetly. Had Chieftain passed the other tests? Sigrid seemed to be desperate if she was using that same tactic again. Spin stood.

"Chieftain!" He shouted, "You can't…!"

"Don't make me say it again, Spin…" BA-1 said roughly. BA-5 flinched visibly, "I am perfectly capable of passing this last test on my own."

"But…!" Spin was interrupted when Morris placed his hand on the young Agent's shoulder.

"Trust is a good thing, Spin," He said sagely, "It not only helps you strengthen relationships, but it keeps you from getting tumors in your brain due to stress."

Spin groaned and looked at Morris with a pleading look in his eye. BA-3 winked.

"If you continue to speak about this, I shall have to forfeit the match for poisoning the well!" Sigrid hissed, "Quiet, all of you!" She then turned and spoke as sweetly as honey, "Now then, Agent Chieftain, may I have the honor of one last dance?"

"So the dance is for two people…?" Chieftain asked. Her sweet visage twisted into something sinister for only a moment, but reverted back in an instant.

"O…Of course…" She said with a smile. BA-1 crossed his arms and thought for a moment, and she began to hiss, "If you don't do something soon, I will be forced to…!"

"Dance with Derek," Chieftain suddenly said. Sigrid stopped her rant and stared in disbelief at the Agent before her, "Did you hear me? Dance with Derek. He needs to meet new people anyway."

"…! You…! You…!" Derek and Sigrid shouted in unison at the lead Agent, "I…! I refuse!"

"Then you forfeit." BA-1 said, "If you refuse to dance, then I win by default."

"If you refuse to dance with me, then…!"

"There were no rules that stated…"

"FINE!!" She screeched, tearing at her hair and stomping her feet as she fell into a fitful rage, "FINE, You…! You filthy Mortal! You…! You win! I refuse to continue this idiocy! Gambling by dancing, you EBA are the most moronic, idiotic, dimwitted, stupid…!"

Spin smiled as she continued to scream, flailing and shouting curses that would make other demons blush. Could it be that Chieftain actually won? He felt a glimmer of hope take hold of him, and he fought the urge to do an escalated jig of his own. Finally, she pointed directly at BA-1 and said, "You want your souls? Then TAKE THEM!"

She pulled out the jar of souls, sans one Agent J, and with a shout, she raised the jar above her head. For a fleeting moment, the Agents flinched forward, afraid she would throw it to the floor. They didn't know if souls could survive that kind of treatment! Chieftain glared at the Succubus, and Sigrid glared back. Eventually, with a flick of her wrist, she opened the jar, and in an instant, the entire world seemed to disappear. The souls of 238 Human Beings soared through the air, and the entire place seemed to be compressed with them. After some time, the souls appeared to collect their bearings, and each flew off into the sky, searching out their bodies and hoping intently to be free from the captivity of the demon.

Finally, when the Agents could breathe without inhaling someone's life essence, BA-1 looked back at Sigrid, "And now, the last one…" he said. The Succubus glared at him.

"Are you talking about this one…?" She asked, lifting up the tiny vial that held their friend. Spin hissed at her feigned ignorance, "I'm afraid I can't do that, BA-1… You see, you said that all of the same rules apply as Agent J's game. The rules explicitly stated that I would release all the souls that came before him.

"Therefore, I still claim ownership of Agent J, and there's nothing you really can do about it…"

"Wanna bet!?" BA-5 shouted, rushing forward, prepared to beat the living daylights out of her. Asha or no, this demon needed some manners, and he was planning on beating some into her! He just hoped that when he returned to school tomorrow, he wouldn't continue being angry at the girl he adored.

Chieftain barely caught the kid before he did anything rash and stupid, "Spin, we need to think about this…"

"Yeah right! I've had enough of her mind games! She's playing us like fiddles…!"

"Spin!"

"One more game! One more game! If I beat you, you'd better give him back! You give him back!!" BA-5 shouted, "I'll show you, no one makes a fool out of the Elite Beat Agents!" Sigrid stared in utter disbelief as Spin hyperventilated, nearly spent from his outburst. He adjusted his headphones and continued, "One more game… If I win, you give J back…"

"And if you lose, I will take not only your soul, but those of your friends…" Sigrid said, "These constant challenges are taxing me. We demons need our rest as well. So I'm raising the stakes.

"All of you will join Agent J if you lose, Agent Spin…" She smiled, knowing that it would be simple for the other Agents to refuse. Without their acknowledgement, Spin couldn't continue, and she would be free. What a simple plan…

…that ended in failure, "So that's it then?" BA-1 asked, "I accept."

"Me too!" Morris replied, "I would be a hypocrite if I didn't trust you after you did for us, Spin!"

"…Just don't screw up…" Derek muttered. Sigrid's jaw dropped lightly, and Spin smiled exuberantly.

"Thanks, everyone! I won't let you down!" He then turned back to the Succubus, "Alright, Demon! Here's the rules!"

To Be Continued...

---

Boo, have you ever had the feeling that the story you're writing is so AWESOME... until you get to the exciting parts and then it just seems like crap? I'm feeling that right now.

Hope someone likes it, at least. So so so mediocre... I wouldn't even read this garbage...


	4. Chapter 4

Hope you guys enjoy it. Nothing much else to say. Have fun while you...

READ ON!

---

"All of you will join Agent J if you lose, Agent Spin…" She smiled, knowing that it would be simple for the other Agents to refuse. Without their acknowledgement, Spin couldn't continue, and she would be free. What a simple plan…

…that ended in failure, "So that's it then?" BA-1 asked, "I accept."

"Me too!" Morris replied, "I would be a hypocrite if I didn't trust you after you did for us, Spin!"

"…Just don't screw up…" Derek muttered. Sigrid's jaw dropped lightly, and Spin smiled exuberantly.

"Thanks, everyone! I won't let you down!" He then turned back to the Succubus, "Alright, Demon! Here's the rules! It'll be a one on one match. No gambling, no games, just straight out brawling!"

"Brawling!?" The Succubus hissed, "Obviously a MALE would think of something as stupid as that!" No one bothered to point out that the usually feminine dancing was also stupid according to her.

"Only fists, no weapons," Spin said, ticking said rules off on his fingers, "Hmmm… You're not allowed to bring anyone else into this… It's just us and our fight, alright?"

"…Fine… using your friends as a trap to get you to give up is way too underhanded, even for me," She lied, "Now then, shall we get down to this…?"

"Wait, there's one more thing," Spin raised his finger, and frowned deeply at her, "If I lose, I'll be losin' all my friends. But if YOU lose, you have to leave Earth, and the Heavens'll smite you if you EVER return!" Sigrid shuddered and ducked instinctively, as if expecting a bolt of smiting to hit her right then. However, that seemed too dramatic and not funny enough, so it didn't happen.

"F…Fine…" She said, trying not to let the mention of those Above scare her, "I accept. But I will not lose… how can a mere Mortal defeat a Demon of Hell?" She crouched down, preparing for battle, "The answer? Impossible…"

"We'll see about that!" BA-5 said. He tossed his microphone away (and Chieftain caught it), because it was obviously a weapon, and he fell into a boxing stance. He had never been much of a scrapper, but he HAD watched some boxing on TV! …Once… kinda… at his friend's house… But he was sure he'd fall into step eventually! Fighting was 90 percent instinct! He hoped…!

"Wait." Spin stopped immediately and Sigrid hissed when Chieftain stepped forward, "Something seems amiss…" He thought for a moment, "There's another reason you're accepting Spin's proposal, isn't there?"

The Succubus's eyes were like slits when Spin turned to his superior, "What do ya mean, Chieftain?"

"Why did you accept Spin's proposal, Demon?" Chieftain asked, "why are we so important to you?"

The demon frowned, but her frown turned around and she smiled wickedly, "Do you really want to know, BA-1? I'm surprised you haven't figured it out alright. What do Demons always want more than anything on this planet?

"Chaos…"

Derek cocked an eyebrow, and Sigrid explained, "Do you remember when the Rhombulans invaded Earth? Of course you do, who doesn't? It was a perfect day for us in Hell. Such Chaos made people worried and scared. We harvested many souls during that time.

"…until you came along. All of you coming when the people needed help… It was horrific. People had Hope… Chaos was destroyed along with those aliens… I intend to make sure that doesn't happen again…"

She smiled brightly, "Even if I lose my souls, if I bring all of you back, I'm sure to get rewarded. Truth be told, your entire little troupe isn't well liked where we come from. It'll be simple, defeat your rookie, and I'll be a hero!"

"Except it ain't that simple," Spin said with a cocky smile, "that's 'cause I won't lose."

"What makes you think you can beat me, Mortal…?"

"'Cause my friends'll back me up!"

Sigrid stared at BA-5, and began to laugh, "So, your friendship will save you? We'll see about that…" And before anyone could make another sound, she rushed the Agent, intent on smashing his face in from the get-go.

Spin gasped at her speed, and ducked as quickly as he could, barely dodging her lightning fast punch. He brought his own fist up, and tried not to think of the fact that he was hitting a woman. His grandmother would have his head for this!

Sigrid grunted under the force of his strike, and slammed her fist into the side of BA-5's head. He fell to the ground and rolled as far as he could from her, leaping up and preparing to fight again. Spin set his jaw and stared intently at the demon, who smiled sinisterly, "Something wrong, Agent…?"

"N…No…!" Spin lied. How come she had to look exactly like Asha? This was no way to fight an enemy…! "I was just thinkin' about how you were a…" Spin was interrupted from his excuse when Sigrid used his flustered state to bring her fist to his nose. BA-5 was lifted from the air and flew a foot before he landed on the ground, bounced, and lay still.

"Hah…!" Sigrid said as Derek and Morris stared unbelievably at the prone form on the ground, "That was simple!"

"N…Not…done…yet…!" Sigrid turned and stared as BA-5 dragged himself upward, "I'm… not givin' up yet…!"

Sigrid moved so fast Spin couldn't see her. When he noticed her again, she was bringing her leg down on the Agent's head with a roundhouse kick. Chieftain wondered if he heard the young man's headphones crack when they hit the floor, "Had enough!? Stay down this time!"

"N… No way…!" Spin hissed, pushing himself upward and snorting the blood back up his nose, "I…'m not…!"

He gave a gasp when Sigrid slammed her foot down between his shoulder blades, "Do I have to kill you for you to give up? Holding out like this won't help anything! Torture is one of my favorite pastimes, you know…!" Spin couldn't move; he flailed lightly under her assault, but there was no way he could get out from under her. BA-5 thought fast as she laughed mercilessly, "Beg! BEG for mercy, Mortal! Know now that you will NEVER beat me!"

Spin hissed and reached his hand out. He would never beg for Sigrid's mercy. There was something, however, that he could call out to and still save his pride, "…G…Guys… I can't… do this…! I need… I… Heeeaaaalp…!"

Sigrid looked up in surprise as BA-1, 3, and 4 stepped forward and tapped their feet to an unknown beat, "I should have known you couldn't do it on your own…" Derek said.

"Leave it to us, Spin!" Morris proclaimed.

"Are you ready?" Chieftain asked. The Agents counted off and began, "Three, Two, One, GO!"

Sigrid couldn't believe it! How? How could they? As they sang, Spin pulled his hands into fists, grabbing a chunk of dirt as he did so. The Demon let her guard down for a second, "Shut up! Shut up, all of you!"

It was all BA-5 needed. He pushed himself up unexpectedly and quickly, making Sigrid fall backwards with a shout. She planted her feet on the ground to keep from dropping to the floor, but before she could attack again, Spin whirled on his back and threw the dirt expertly into her eyes. The Demon screeched in anger as she clawed at her eyes, and BA-5 hopped up, smashing his fist into her face.

Sigrid staggered heavily from Spin's assault. How could he have gotten so stronger, so quicker? She looked up and her eyes became slits as she looked at the singing, dancing Agents. It was them! They were using their stupid cheering power to make BA-5 perform much better! There was only one course of action.

The Demon rushed forward, sailing right past Spin. She needed to take out the source of his power…!

The Agents that Sigrid began to assault did nothing to flinch. It would be terribly unprofessional to turn tail and run when someone was attacking them. It was only courteous to see their cheer through to the end. The Succubus raised her hand, preparing to gouge out BA-1's eyes…

…When she was struck in her side by a well aimed kick, delivered by BA-5. She shuddered but kept herself standing, and Spin glared daggers at her, "I said the fight was between us!" he shouted, "Leave them out of this!"

"You…!" Sigrid screeched, "They're helping you! This is no one on one fight!"

"What are you talking about…?" The Demon looked at the Agents, all in succession, "They aren't assistin' me, they just so happen to be singin' and dancin' in our general vicinity."

"You… you can't be serious… That…!"

"…sounds like somethin' you'd make up? I know…!" Spin puffed himself up, "That what you get for gamblin', 'Ma'am'! You lose!"

Sigrid clenched her fists so tight that her nails drew blood, "We'll see about that, filth!" And with that, she leapt at BA-5, prepared to give it her all, "Singing or no, I won't lose, I swear!"

Spin dodged her strike and gave her jaw a left hook, moving nicely to the music, "I shoulda known Demons would swear, seeing as how you're really not supposta do it and all…"

"You little piece of…!" The Succubus reached out to grasp the young man and rip off his face.

She got his sole in her face instead, "Curses!" BA-5 said with a smile, "That's the next thing I figured you were going to use! You're very predictable, Sigrid!"

"Stand still for just one second so I can…!" She blinked when Spin seemingly disappeared. Where the hell had he gone to? She gave a scream when BA-5 slammed his foot onto her back, just between the shoulder blades. She dropped to the floor and Spin smiled brightly.

"How's it feel to be on the receiving end of the dirt tasting festival, Sigrid?" He asked jovially. He then licked his lips like he had tasted something bitter. He could have sworn he just channeled Agent J for a moment there!

"Get off of me! A Mortal! A MORTAL, standing on top of me?" She didn't seem to believe what was happening. Such a thing wasn't possible! "Get off of me before I…!" She struggled mightily, but BA-5 would have none of that. Spin knelt down and grasped her arm.

"I don't want to do this… but it'll save time in the long run…" BA-5 said, suddenly very serious, "Please let my friend go."

"You little…! You haven't won yet! I won't…!" Sigrid screamed aloud as Spin pulled her arm back. He was ready to dislocate it quite easily.

"Please…" He said, lessening the pressure only slightly, "Let… my friend… go…"

"I can't… I can't lose! After all this time…! I've lost it all…! I can't go back empty handed!"

"I'll ask one more time…" Spin said as Sigrid beat the ground with her free hand and sobbed from both pain and humiliation, "Please… Let my friend go…"

"I…! I!!" Sigrid screamed aloud one last time, so loud that even with Spin's headphones (which were used to muffle the sounds of the world that may distract him from his missions), the sound was loud enough to make his ears ring. When she finally realized that her sob story, used to drop BA-5's guard, wasn't working, she finally relinquished, "I…! I…! Fine! I give up! I give up! He's yours, now get off of me!"

Spin dropped her arm like it was an asp and immediately got off of her. He dropped down, resting his arms on his knees, and looked intently at her, "So we get J back?"

"…yes…" The Demon squeaked in utter disgrace at her defeat.

The other Agents began slowing their musical number down, "And we're all free to go…?"

"…yes…" Sigrid didn't even bother looking at the Agent who inquired of her.

"And you won't be comin' back…?"

"…I promise…" She murmured.

There was silence for a moment, and Spin held out his hand, "Give me the vial. Now."

Sigrid sat up (and Spin stood in preparation for another assault, just in case it came), and she reached behind her. The vial was in her hand when she brought it back out for all to see, "It's here. Your friend is here."

Spin smiled, "See? That wusn't so bad…" He said, reaching out to take J back. Chieftain suddenly stood alert when the Succubus's eyes flashed.

"BA-5! Watch yourself!" BA-1 shouted. In a split second, the fake vial disappeared in a puff of smoke; instead, the Demon grasped the rookie's cheeks.

"I can't lose! I refuse! Not now, not ever!" She cackled aloud, "You should remember, Mortals, that words are cheap!" and with that, she bent down to give Spin her Kiss of Death…

…and she blinked when she felt something cool against her fiery lips. Spin's index finger pressed against her lips, and he glared at her, "And you Demons should remember that we EBA don't like bein' toyed with…"

His friends were backing him up; he wouldn't lose! He wound up his free fist and it flew nicely into her nose. She flew backwards, her beautiful face utterly destroyed by the cheer assisted punch. Something glinted in the sky, and BA-5 looked up to see a tiny vial that Sigrid had lost hold of when she was sent flying. It twirled in the air, and Spin gave a cry when it plummeted to earth, "J!" He shouted, leaping forward, his palm outstretched. The tiny vial dropped nicely into his hand, and he sighed in delight as he stood back up. He glanced down at his suit, and grinned sheepishly at his superiors at the fact that it was now covered in mud. Morris smiled lightly and Derek glared at BA-5. There must have been a better way to do that! "I'll dry clean it later, promise…!"

"You'll dry clean all of ours as punishment," Chieftain said. Spin groaned. No one seemed to care about the fact that he saved BA-2! "But the question is… what are we going to do with this Demon…?"

"You…" Sigrid the "Beautiful" (as it seemed she would never be called again) dragged herself up, her arm hanging limply at her side and her other hand attempting to cover her ruined face, "You can't… do this to me… Mortals… can't beat… Demons…!"

"Would you like a reality check?" BA-3 asked with a laugh, "We just did!"

"I… I swear… I swear I will… not let this one slide… Demons… are immortal… if it takes a million years, I will show you all… that… Demons…"

"Would you go back to where you belon' and let celebrate in peace?" Spin asked. Sigrid screeched aloud at their attacks on her shattered pride, "We've gotten the 'I'll get you and your little dog' line so many times, it's gettin' old…!"

"I will watch you BURN!" She screamed one last time. With that, she whirled around and disappeared into the brush and trees. Spin suddenly frowned when she was vanished, and Chieftain blinked.

"Is something wrong, Spin?" He asked.

"No…" the Agent replied, "I just thought she'd do something COOLER, like open a hole inta Hell itself and hop in, cackling maniacally."

Morris thought about it, "I think she probably would have done that if she hadn't lost horribly."

"As much as I like J's prone body not uttering something stupid to accompany this rather idiotic conversation…" Derek began, "But don't you have something to fix, Spin?"

BA-5 chuckled at BA-4, "R… Right!" he said, turning and walking over to J's soulless body. He looked like he was sleeping: his chest even rose and fell as the organs within did their very best to keep him running. That brought an extremely strange question to Spin's mind. If the soul was gone… and yet the brain was still active… what did it think? Shaking THAT thought from his mind, he worked furiously on the extremely tight cork that sealed J's soul within the vial.

"You don't honestly need us to cheer to uncork something, do you?" Derek asked.

"It's hard!" Spin practically whined. Finally, however, he was able to move it slightly, and soon it came off with a satisfying "Pop!" Spin gasped lightly when the lightly blue soul shot from its prison, and Morris had to duck to keep the shooting soul from knocking his hat from his head. It zoomed around, much faster than the other souls they had seen (probably because of J's eccentric attitude), and suddenly stopped just ten feet above his body. It swirled around in multiple circles, like a dog preparing to settle in its bed, and shot downward.

J's soul knocked into him so hard his eyes bulged and his hands popped into the air. Finally, his breathing returned to normal, and he tested to make sure everything was working, "Fingers… toes… eyes…" He screwed his face up and looked down his body with a frown, "Bowels…"

"J…! You're alright!"

"Nice to see you again, J."

"I thought I told you to take care of yourself…"

"Agent BA-2…" J sat up, resting himself on his elbow (as he was still trying to remember how to move properly), and properly addressed Chieftain with a two fingered, informal salute, "J, I thought we told you to be careful."

"Did you? I must have had wax in my ears…" J said, smirking. Spin slammed his fists into the ground.

"Don't you pull that crap with us, J! We were worried about you!" BA-5 shouted.

"Thanks, everyone," BA-2 suddenly said, making Spin stop mid-rant (as J always seemed to have the power to do), "I couldn't really see you, or anything, for that matter, but I felt you. I felt you all… You all worked so hard to bring me back. Thank you."

"I'm not completely sure this is the J we all know," Morris said, "Is he being serious for once?"

"I don't believe it," Derek replied, his arms crossed.

"Yeah, where's the real J?" Spin asked, smiling. BA-2 turned and suddenly blinked.

"Hey… Spin…?" He said. BA-5 blinked as he sat up completely and pointed at Spin's headphones, "Is… is that a crack…?"

BA-5 gave a surprised shout and removed his headphones (a very rare occurrence when acting as an Agent!) It was true! During the battle, Sigrid must have dealt enough damage to crack his headphones, "Oh no… just great!" He said, fingering the star that had been cracked in two, "These ain't even mine! The Commander's gunna kill me!"

"Let me see that…" BA-1 looked it over after it was handed to him, and he smiled, "They're not ruined… We'll just need a new casing. Of course, it'll come out of J's salary."

"Mine!?" J said, placing his hands on his knees as he sat Indian-Style on the floor, "But wh… oh…" BA-2 didn't say another word, and smiled, "Alright, my salary it is!"

"…and remember, BA-5…" Chieftain said, tossing the headphones back to Spin, "Dry cleaning. Remember."

Spin sighed lightly, "Yeah, I know, Chief… …tain…" Spin and J looked at each other, and smirked at each other. Derek sighed. BA-2 was such a bad influence on the rookie!

---

Everything after the mission was a blur. The Elite Beat Divas congratulated the men on a job well done (and Spin tried not to blush when Starr and Missy gave him hugs for being brave under fire), and J moonwalked all around the HQ just to make sure he still had the moves (he did, so that was good!) Spin was just too tired to think about anything, and hardly even recognized the fact that Khan gave HIM a thumbs up for his good work. BA-5 was asleep on the couch by the time the other Agents pumped their arms in the air, congratulating themselves on "Mission Complete!"

Spin forgot that he still had homework to do for school tomorrow…

…Until two hours before school was supposed to start, "Philip J. Jackson, just what in Gawd's blazes are you doing!?" His grandmother called up to him as he furiously worked at it, "I don't hea any runnin' water! Why aren't you brushin' your teeth? We can't afford cavities! No one can afford cavities in this hovel!"

"I'll do that in a moment, Gramma!" Agent Spin (Now High School Student Philip Jackson) groaned as he scribbled mathematical formulae down in ways that were most likely not right at all, all the while yawning loudly and trying not to pass out.

Finally, Philip flew out the door, only to be stopped by his grandmother, who grabbed him by his dress-code-collar, "Philip! You'd best not be thinkin' o' going to school by your lonesome! Your sister needs a ride!"

"Where IS she?" Philip shouted, "Jessie! Get your butt out here! You're making me late!"

"It's okay, Philip!" Jessie called back as she brushed her hair, "My class don't start for another half hour!"

"But mine starts in five minnits!"

Philip was happy when he dropped Jessie off at school (he didn't have to continue enduring her off key singing of "Hakuna Matata"), and made it to his own class only ten minutes late. It was a new record.

"Hey Phil, take it easy next time…" Kyle said as his friend slid into the classroom and scrambled to his desk with a quick apology to the teacher (who was also half-awake as he read off some historic literature), "You know our teacher hardly calls on you for being late…"

"You should see my tardy record…" Philip moaned as the teacher droned on, "Gramma had a fit… She assumes I'm usin' her car to hang out at the convenience store an' spendin' my lunch money on bubble gum an' switchblades 'fore class."

Kyle blinked, "You can get switchblades at a convenience store?"

"Hell if I know…" Philip groaned as their teacher tiredly asked the friends to shut up.

"Now does anyone know the question to answer 26?" The teacher spoke up. Asha raised her hand and rose from her seat.

"The Succubi of Hell were meant to seduce men to dark deeds with the promise of sexual rewards," she answered without a hitch. Philip shot his head up as the teacher thanked Asha and continued.

"Oh Goooood…" The student moaned, "I'll never look at her the same way again…"

"What's wrong with you, Philip?" Kyle said, "You really need to get more sleep."

Philip didn't even reply: he was already drooling on the desk. Kyle sighed and began taking notes for his friend. He really wondered what Philip's part time job that he kept talking about was. It certainly taxed him a whole lot… Maybe Kyle should talk to Philip about maybe asking those Elite Beat Agents to help him juggle his time and energy better… that might actually be a good idea… Of course, that seemed improbable. Philip refused to believe they existed.

"Heh," Kyle thought to himself as he jotted down some more notes, "his loss…"

The End!

---

Much better! I liked the way it ended a lot more than the middle. I guess that's a good thing, the climax needs to be AWESOME, right?

Anyway, reviews are appreciated.


End file.
